Get A Life

Climbers frequently become obsessed with their new route projects. Be it a Flatirons boulder problem, a sport route in Clear Creek, or, as in this case, a multi-pitch desert spire, sometimes the climb will get the better of the climber.

Such was the case with Get A Life, one of the finest climbs in the desert region. Bret Ruckman, one of the many unsung talents in Colorado (and Utah) climbing, discovered this imposing crack line on an obscure pillar in upper Monument Canyon, and became...obsessed. With Fred Knapp he established the route as a five-pitch 5.11 A0. Continuous crack pitches, some funky rock (but excellent climbing), a killer line, a short stretch of clean aid, and an exciting face climbing finale, all added up to a great desert routes. Now if only it would go free...

Ironically, the hardest climbing is only 15 feet long, but in that short distance much humble pie can be consumed. After a number of attempts spread out over many months, Bret finally succeeded in leading the crux pitch in excellent style. Finally he could resume a life back to normal.

Get a Life is located on the appropriately named Clueless Tower, 45 minutes down the trail from the Coke Bottles/Upper Monument trailhead on Rimrock Drive. As you descend the Wingate cliffs, past some steep switchbacks, you will soon see a detached pillar on your left. Upon closer inspection, a dramatic crack line will emerge from the red rock walls. Just to the right of this line is an imposing wide crack line (Wide Load, 5.11+, FFA either Pat Adams and Jonathan Thesunga, or party unknown). Rumor has it some climbers approached the route from the rim using an aluminum extension ladder to cross the gap, then rappelled the route. One can also rap from the rim a short distance in the gap, summit, then rap the route to start.

Pitch 1: Climb to a left-facing corner, placing every last #2 Friend you brought. Excellent 5.11-. Belay in an awkward pod.

Pitch 2: Continue up the corner system to a 2-bolt anchor.

Pitch 3: Climb the tight finger crack (TCUs) past a hanging right-facing corner that is perfect off-fingers. Desperate. If you succeed in getting your feet into the corner then it's only another 10 feet of struggle to reach the belay. A short, full-value pitch of climbing.

Pitch 4: Up less-than-perfect rock, nice crack climbing, but funky, then up to a nice ledge.

Pitch 5: Face climb on excellent stone past 2 bolts, then move left and up easier (but still exciting) rock to the proud summit. 5.11- PG-13.

Rappel the route with double ropes.

The route gets full sun, and is best done in autumn through spring. Straightforward clean aid on the short 5.12 pitch will yield a worthwhile 5.11 A0 ascent. Be prepared to have a wonderful rock climbing experience!

A set of wired nuts, TCUs (2 sets), Friends #1 to #3.5, with several extras in the #1.5 and #2 range. QDs and slings. 2 ropes.